Let’s Name It First: This Isn’t Just “Overthinking.”
What you’re doing isn’t just thinking too much. It’s rumination—a mental hamster wheel that feels like “just trying to figure it out” but ends up hijacking your nervous system and hollowing out your sense of safety. If you’ve been looping on something someone said, how a moment went, or what might happen next week, your body’s been living in the future—or in the past—while your soul waits quietly for you to come home. This article will discuss why it’s so difficult to stop ruminating and will give you some self-help tips.
As always, this article is not meant to replace therapy. If you need support for your obsessive thinking or rumination, please feel free to contact me or a therapist in your area.
Rumination and obsessive thinking can be managed with the right help.
What Is Rumination, Really?
Rumination is the psychological pattern of repetitively and obsessively thinking about distressing events, future anxieties, or unresolved problems. You might be replaying a tough conversation on loop. Or spinning through worst-case scenarios like mental Netflix. The problem is—it doesn’t lead to resolution. It leads to exhaustion.
Studies show that chronic rumination is tightly linked to increased risks of depression, anxiety, insomnia, and even PTSD-related symptoms. It’s not just a habit. It’s a nervous system caught in a loop.
Rumination Feels Like:
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“Why did I say that?” on repeat at 1 a.m.
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Mentally rehearsing every possible response to a future conflict.
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Going over the same argument in your head with someone who isn’t even in the room.
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A gnawing sense of “I should have known better.”
Sound familiar? That’s your protector part, trying to keep you safe by reviewing every past and future threat. But here’s the twist: the more you ruminate, the less safe you feel.
Why Do We Ruminate?
Because it feels like we’re solving something. But we’re not. We’re stuck in what scientists call a maladaptive problem-solving strategy.
“Your nervous system is sensing threat, even if your mind knows you’re safe.”
Ruminating is like carrying an invisible backpack filled with “What ifs,” “Should haves,” and “Why did I…?” You didn’t pack it on purpose. It was handed to you by early patterning, attachment wounds, and a culture that confuses busyness with control.
The Snowball Effect: Rumination + Mental Health
Rumination is a core feature of multiple mental health diagnoses:
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Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)
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Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
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Depression
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Complex PTSD
Worse still? It fuels these conditions. You worry because you’re anxious, and you become more anxious because you’re worrying. It’s a loop that feeds on itself.
How to Stop Ruminating (Even If Your Brain Doesn’t Want To)
Let’s drop the rope with shame and pick up curiosity. You can interrupt the pattern. Not by thinking better—but by feeling safer. Let’s get into it.
1. Name the Loop Out Loud
“I’m noticing my mind wants to fix something that already happened (or hasn’t happened yet).”
This simple act of naming invites your prefrontal cortex back online. It signals your system that you’re aware—which is a powerful first step toward regulation.
2. Get Physical (Interrupt the Pattern)
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Do 10 jumping jacks.
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Run your hands under cold water.
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Take a brisk walk.
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Do 10-30 seconds of bilateral stimulation (like tapping each side of your body).
Changing your physical state changes your mental loop. Your mind rides the wave of your nervous system—give it a new wave.
3. Switch Locations
Your environment holds energy. If you always ruminate on the couch, your brain associates the couch with the loop. Break the pattern with a walk, a new room, or a change of scenery—like your favorite coffee shop or park bench.
4. Challenge the Thought, Gently
Ask your inner protector:
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“Is this thought trying to protect me?”
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“Do I have any real evidence for this belief?”
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“What would I tell my best friend if they said this to me?”
This isn’t about denying reality. It’s about reality-testing your brain’s worst-case scenarios with compassion, not contempt.
5. Create a Worry Window
Designate a 10-minute window each day where you’re allowed to ruminate. Write it down. Sit with it. Then close the door on it.
Paradoxically, giving your brain permission to worry can reduce the urgency to do it all day.
6. Resolve or Reframe the Trigger
If your mind keeps looping around a specific task, issue, or conversation—your system might be asking for closure or clarity.
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Can you take action?
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Can you speak a boundary?
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Can you create a to-do list, email draft, or journal letter you’ll never send?
Sometimes, the loop is your brain’s way of saying, “Hey. This feels unresolved.”
7. Practice Mindfulness That Feels Doable
Forget the 30-minute silent meditation. Start with 2 minutes of:
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Box breathing (inhale 4, hold 4, exhale 4, hold 4)
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Noticing 5 things you can see, 4 you can feel, 3 you can hear…
Let your mind drop into your body. That’s where safety lives.
8. Track Your Triggers with Curiosity, Not Criticism
Rumination isn’t random. It has a rhythm. Ask yourself:
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When do I tend to ruminate the most?
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What’s happening in my body before it starts?
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What story is my brain trying to complete?
“What if this wasn’t about the thought—but about what your nervous system expects?”
Compassionate Honesty: When You Might Need More Support
If these strategies aren’t cutting it, that makes so much sense. Rumination is often trauma-adjacent, and self-help strategies can only go so far when your system is stuck in survival mode.
Therapy is a powerful place to explore:
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What your rumination is protecting you from
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The emotional root beneath the loop
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How to rewire the brain-body loop from a place of co-regulation
You don’t have to carry this backpack alone anymore. This pattern isn’t serving you—and you deserve relief.
Final Thought: Rumination Isn’t You. It’s a Part of You.
There’s a difference. The part of you that ruminates is trying to keep you safe, keep you prepared, or keep you connected to someone who once hurt you.
But you’re the adult now. And you can let that part rest.
Ready to Stop Ruminating?
If this post resonated deeply—and you’re ready for more than hacks and breathing tips—our therapy team is here to walk beside you. We specialize in untangling the roots of rumination, from childhood narratives to attachment injuries to anxiety loops.
You can feel safe again. You can trust yourself again. And we’re here to help.
➡️ Schedule a session with our therapists today—because healing happens in safe, co-regulated spaces.
